9.10.07
some days u just wake up and wonder to urself "why did i wake up today?"
its like...u just cant seem to gather the reason for ur existence.
today was one of those days.
i just cant seem to find a reason to go to work, except for the fact that its a responsibility of mine and i'm trying hard not to shirk.
then again i reached work and my team leader was moaning away about the freaking SR report and how his head was on the chopping block. nor did he thank me for the fact i did 3 people's jobs in 1 day.
and at the same time i wonder what's my direction.
both in life and in my relationship.
i wanna go back to study, tho i dunno if its gonna be possible or what i'm gonna study cos i cant seem to decide what it is i wanna do for the rest of my life.
and at the same time, i dunno if im ready. maybe its me expecting too much from myself, or unrealistic expectations from the relationship. or if its because im not yet used to thinking as a whole instead of a person. whatever it is, im pretty sure im gonna need plenty of guidance and understanding from her.
whatever it is, i think i have to stop distancing myself from people.
realisation struck that i'm trying to be independent, at the expense of myself and everyone around me
posted by the child on 10:19 AM
