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certainly has been an uneventful week, and that has made it pretty darn good.
last few posts, i sounded pissy and angsty. i still am.
what is to be expected of life?
they should stop teaching crap like history or Moral at school and start
teaching real thought provoking things. we're just becoming machines for
an industry thats killing the world...
oh. and im tired. so friggin tired. oh so fuckin tired, but i cant stop.
now i know what john mayer meant when he sang that "no, we're never gonna
stop this train"
so i put this on myself. meh. who gives a shit anyway?
lets see what happens when i get burnt out...big explosion that wrecks
everything in sight? or implosion and just go poof? hahahahaha
khong mac quan bo den truong = no wearing jeans to school
khong mac quan, bo den truong = no wear pants, crawl to school
this made me lol for real. serious lol moment
yes i know my blog looks crapped up...
its gonna remain this boring look till i find a new skin..which wont be
for a while. heh
i am horribly messy.
and today, i finally cleared up the mess that is my table. its been months
since i last organized it, mainly for a lack of motivation (aka mega
laziness). actually decided to clear it up cos i have notes strewn and
hidden here and there. notes for school, notes for APS...and so on and so
forth, mixed with statements, bills and other crap.
and while going through all the stuff, i found a lot of stuff from past
months, even years still there. old boxes and wrappings that used to
contain gifts, birthday cards, even my old work contract (nicely kept in
the large envelope, too) and actually...never did realize why i kept these
things from the past. but recently thinking has made me realize that i'm
actually afraid i'll forget these last few years that've had some of the
biggest impact on me as an individual. but as of today, i'm walking
forward and tossing most of em away cos i find that i still remember
almost everything vividly. most especially, my time in poly. even more so
during the 6 months starting from Camp Eagle up till the time when all our
events were completed. interestingly, im still unable to bring myself to
throw away a brightly colored shoebox with just a few items in it. it
doesnt seem to affect me anymore, yet i dont see myself throwing it away.
i guess all in all i am a pretty sentimental person, and i really do
treasure people who were and still are part of my life. if ever i do feel
a need, or see myself moving once more to a new country, i definitely know
i will miss those ive come to know in my time here, irregardless if they
are in the same country or not. tho i wonder how many of them would echo
my sentiments.
maybe some of you have come across a motivational poster that reads "You
cannot discover new lands if you're not willing to lose sight of the
shore.", which is actually a variation of a quote from André Gide, "One
doesn't discover new lands without consenting to lose sight of the shore
for a very long time." I however, would also add that one must look back
at the shore to measure how far one has travelled for that is the only way
to know how much we've discovered. today was a day i looked through the
lens back at the shore, and i found it a way away. but i wasn't scared,
not anymore. slowly moving my looking glass towards a new destination, tho
i dunno where it is. but it seems that in a few years, i may be on a
different continent.
and when that time comes, i hope these shores would welcome me back when i
would want to return and reminisce
i love paradoxes...
if you know that you know nothing, then you know something.
posted by the child on 2:06 PMPowered by: