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good god, who knew passing out could hurt so much.
one moment you're walking to the toilet cos you feel like throwing up,
next you get this thought "oh this aint good"..and suddenly, you're on the
floor sitting up against a wall head leaning..upper lip cut and aching and
you cant figure out how you got there.
you find yourself, gasping for breath, head spinning, heart pumping
excessively, and wishing you could feel better soon. much like a break up
lol
humans..are contradictory. cant remember if ive ever said it before...
it seems that the capability to create and be ingenious has also made us
such complexities that we never fail to complicate matters which are
essentially simple. "guided" by our ethics and principles..we try to make
sense of the situation, and justify them in what that decision brings us.
some even take it so far as to try and consider how others will benefit
from it, or more accurately, how they think others will benefit from it if
ever at all.
furthermore, oftentimes we do not see the positives till we go thru the
negatives. one may not know what happiness can be, till they have gone
thru pain...know not what is a wrong decision without having first made a
bad decision.
how do we live? in olden days, births often came at the loss of the
mother's life. medical science took care of that. but it seems for every
progress we make, we also go backwards in one way, or more sometimes as
cases may be. retrospectively speaking, we were more human when science
and professions had not reached their peak. as we learn more, make more,
take more...we create more gray areas. and our humanity, will drive us to
correct it by doing something else to attempt to govern it, or justify the
means by the end.
we like control, dont we? and when something cannot be controlled, we try
to alienate it..or worse still, eliminate it. preservation has never been
our strong point. at the core of it, we somehow like to see ourselves
moving forward, because we think forward is the right way to go. after
all, gaining is not bad thing..is it? how many people have
considered...said..hey, maybe we had something good going back then and
maybe we should go stick to that?
pooh pooh that bugger and throw him in the prison for being anti-progress
for the good of our humanity!
where exactly am i going with this? hmm...
not a clue really.
we live to achieve our goals, we do not want to stop for fear of failing.
being driven forward by 2 opposing forces which should technically put us
at stalemate, that is truly what being human is about..i think.
at some points, i wonder if my musings are even worth noting. i find it
hard to recognise where i am at this point. i never knew i could survive
at the hectic speed my life is moving at this moment. then again, ive been
used to solidarity thru most of my life and im really just going back to
depending on myself as i have when growing up. so rather, i think im back
at square 1 again. like getting a game over and going back to the start of
the game, only this time knowing what kind of secret move the boss is
gonna use against you..so you have time to prepare.
if only life was a game, eh?
posted by the child on 2:33 PMEugene oh eugene, where the hell are you?
well malacca was good. reaction from family about my hair, not so ahaha
well i had loads of time, and that means thinking time. add on the
spammage of greys anatomy and boston legal and thats a lot of food for
thought
doubt id remember everything to repost here, if i do, i will
tho i wonder who even reads my thinking posts?
posted by the child on 12:02 PMPowered by: