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im pretty thankful for the fact that the mind thinks faster than bodies can act/react, or is physically possible
cos im pretty sure i would do stupid things like run all the way to a foreign country to say hi to a friend cos i suddenly thought of them. or send someone to the skies for blocking my way when i walk(would they still be blocking my way if i was capable of walking at super speed or flyin?). or i dunno what else...kinda have many things on my mind recently.
one would think that there should be some limit to how many things a brain can juggle simultaneously, but then i'd liken my brain to Hyper Threading Technology™ (yes i looked it up on the Character Map to prevent Intel from bringing me to court. i are afraid of laws [insert sad face])...hopping from one idea/thought/issue to another constantly
also one would imagine there would be a strain on sanity/mental health from having so many things to do/consider at the same time. then again, ive managed to set an amazingly busy pace of life, that i once never imagined i would be capable of living. is that a sign of how much ive changed?
ive known...i change constantly. ferreting out things i dont like about myself. getting myself to change it. some friends are quite amazed that im capable of getting myself to change things within a short frame of time. and i think its good and all that im capable of it...but, am i ever going to stop? to some extent, i believe in "there's always room for improvement". then i think back of what ive said about how humanity has progressed, and is now progressing at an exponential speed due to technology's help. humanity is not about to stop progressing, and is taking nature's health along with it for a wild crazy ride that may not have a nice corner for nature to recover from nausea. likewise, am i going to take changing myself so seriously to the point that i alter into this person that's never really himself at any one point?
am i going to MAKE a schizophrenic personality out of myself?
reading this post would make it clear to most of you why a lot of people wouldnt be able to keep up with me should i be having a conversation where filters between head and mouth is not available. hence, please do keep me away from having too much liquor cos it seems to have that effect on me. or a triple shot of espresso. or quad, or quin, which ever would pique my curiosity.
now thats something i could never change...my god damned curiosity. a number of friends have already been (un)fortunate to be in my company when i go along with an idea that comes out of curiosity (added with a nice twist of stupid optimism and a just-nice touch of "that sounded like a good idea..at that moment"-moment). and since i can never be without myself, i too have been pulled into that nice bit of (mis)fortune.
and after typing so much, i suddenly...lost track of anything else i wanted to say. well, not so much lost track as cant decide what i want to say now.
despite all the changes, some things never change. like how i hate my father. and myself. and im suddenly...rather depressed. i cant even keep a mood for long, heh. so much for optimism...
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